How to Make a Million Bucks as a Psychic

Want to make tons of money from your psychic gifts? No problem. Just follow my simple step by step method:

1. Dowse the stock market and invest everything you have in the top performer stock.
2. Write a book on how to dowse the stock market and invest the profits in the top performer stock you dowsed.
3. Use your telepathic powers along with your Causal Body Willpower to get yourself invited on all the major talk shows, especially Joy Behar, my rave fave talk show host.
4. Use your telekinetic powers to transfer all the gold from Fort Knox to your home, preferably in an unusued guest room or walk-in closet.
5. Apply your persuasion-power to any wealthy elderly relation who has included you in their Last Will & Testament.
6. Turn on your Charisma and Seduction Power to get local residents and neighbors to stop by your house and give you money.
7. Use your Telepathic Powers to convince the IRS to write a tax return for $1 million to your personal bank account.

None of those appeal to you? Here's an even easier method to make $1 million dollars from your psychic gifts:

Start with $2 million.